


In My Blood

by KathPetrovaDiary



Series: F1 2018 Season [2]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, M/M, Sebastidan, Swear Words, australia 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 23:55:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14176104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KathPetrovaDiary/pseuds/KathPetrovaDiary
Summary: Sebastian is having doubts about Ferrari and his own skills before the Australian GP.Daniel sets his mind at ease.Set Australian GP 2018





	In My Blood

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the new Shawn Mendes song: In My Blood.  
> Listening to it, it reminded me instantly of Sebastian and the season opener gave an idea.  
> I planned on writing this earlier, but I went to Barcelona so I only found the time to write it now.
> 
> Anyhow, enjoy <3

Nerves are eating him alive. He is standing next to Loria as he chews on his lip. She is by far not the fastest car and as if that isn’t bad enough on its own, she has no balance at all. Or maybe it isn’t his car, maybe it’s him. Kimi doesn’t seem to have any problems with his Ferrari. He’s pretty fast, slides easily through the corners and enjoyes riding it, despite the fact he was barely in the car during testing.  
Sebastian sighs as he goes with his hand over the smooth sidepod of Loria. Third on the grid in Albert Park isn’t exactly what he’d wanted before the session started, but he can’t change that now. He’d made mistakes and not only himself but the team as well are going to pay for it during the race.

“Sebastian, it’s time to get to the track.” Maurizio is standing behind him as he places his hands on the German’s shoulders. “You’ll do great.”  
He snorts inwardly, but appreciates it though. Maurizio always knows what to say to him, but today feels different. He had hoped for a better car, no wished for one and for luck to be by his side. Luck is out of their hands, but the team should have done better. He did all he could to be prepared during the winter break but the team didn’t do enough. He is never going to say it out loud, especially not to the press, but it can be read off his face.  
“Don’t get your hopes up.” Sebastian says before moving past his boss to grab his gear. He feels Maurizio’s eyes on him, but knows that the man is going to leave without another word. So he does, but someone else enters his personal space.

“Where is Seb and what have you done with him?” The blond’s jaw clenches shut as he turns around with a sigh. “Antti, not now.” He glances at his trainer. A frown forms on the Finn’s forehead, but he doesn’t give a fuck right now.  
“Seb, what’s wrong?” Sebastian picks up his helmet, putting it on before replying. “Everything is. I’m sick of this shit. I’m done with driving behind Lewis. I’m done with Ferrari and tifiosi.” He turns to look fully at Antti. “I’m done with Formule One.”  
Silence falls over them. “Then why don’t you retire?”  
Sebastian’s breath is stuck in his throat. His gear feels heavy and warm against his skin. He feels nauseous. Without another word, he closes his visor and steps towards his car. 

The drive towards the grid feels different. Everything surrounding him hurts like his senses are registering it fiercer. The rumbling of the motor tears his eardrums apart, the sun burns his eyes,…  
As his breath becomes more rapid, he begins to panic. Sebastian feels his heart hammering in his chest, mouth becoming dry.  
“Radio check.” Comes the voice of his engineer through the radio but he ignores it. He just wants to bring the car home around this one lap. He needs fresh air.  
Sebastian slams it on the breaks as he sees the back of Pierre Gasly’s Toro Rosso on the grid, ushering his mechanics to come quickly to the car. He needs to get out. He needs to be away of his Ferrari.

The moment Loria is in the right spot, Sebastian jumps out of the car and practically runs towards the barrier to find a spot in the shadow. He takes off his gear and places it carelessly on the ground before sitting next to it.  
He rests his head on his knees, trying to calm himself. To no avail.  
The world spins around him, the smell of grass makes him want to throw up and the sound of the fans cheering is becoming too much. Sebastian wants to scream his lungs out, tell everyone to fuck off.  
He feels Antti come closer and he does just that. “Leave!” His personal trainer does as he’s told and no one else of the staff nor press wants to do any different. Everyone, except one person clad in navy blue.

“Seb?” He ignores the voice, prays whoever it is decides to leave. “Hey, Seb.”  
He recognizes the accent, but he can’t connect the dots to decipher who it is.  
Suddenly a pair of hands are placed on his shoulders before a knee rests against his own. “Seb?”  
He looks up, meeting a pair of warm brown eyes and a worried smile. “Everything okay?” Daniel.  
He didn’t realize how much he is trembling until Daniel squeezes his shoulder tightly. “It’s fine. What’s wrong?”  
A shaky breath escapes him as he leans into Daniel’s touch.  
“It’s too much Dan.” He doesn’t care about the camera’s right now or his confidentiality. “My car is shit, my career is ending and I don’t want this anymore.”  
Daniel licks his lips before grabbing Sebastian’s face between his palms.  
“Listen to me, you dramatic asshole. Your car may be shit, but you’re behind the wheel and you are everything but shit. You drove a fucking Toro Rosso to a win for God’s sake! Secondly, you’re in your prime. Yes, it’s been a while since you’ve won a championship, but you were on the top step in Brazil five months ago. And third,” Daniel slaps him across the cheek before getting up. Sebastian remains stunned on the floor, glancing up at the Aussie.  
“Sebastian Vettel doesn’t get to give up.” 

 

He knocks on the wooden door. As he waits Sebastian stares nervously down the corridor, hoping no one would spot him here. A moment later, the door opens to reveal a PJ-clad Daniel.  
“Thought I’d see you,” He says with a soft smile. Not the huge one seen on TV. Just the smile solemly reserved for him.  
“I wanted to thank you.” Sebastian says looking anywhere but Daniel straight in the eye. “What you said before the race… It really helped.” He bites his bottom lip, glancing up at the driver.  
“I just said out loud what everyone already knows.” Daniel winks at Sebastian before opening the door a bit wider.  
“Now,” He grins at the German. “You coming in for some celebration or what?”  
Sebastian laughs before entering the room.  
As long as he has Daniel, he can face everything. Even his own insecurities.

The End

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and reviews always welcome <3


End file.
